Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
I'm not sure. I have to find the Greeks I was with last night and see if they can explain to me why I can't hear out of my right ear and why I look like I got the shit kicked out of me
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
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