im watching my roommate bang this girl. she doesn't look like she's any good, because he has a bored look on his face...
google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
There's a picture of you on facebook laying in the street with 3 cops standing over you after you faceplanted off that guy's shoulders.
Is that what happened to my face?!
My arms are still sore. Apparently, lube wrestling is the best workout ever.
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
You yelled "NICE PAJAMAS" at a construction worker wearing a reflective jumpsuit while we rode past on a bike taxi
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
Randomize
