Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
A homeless man in dtwn SF was blasting lil wayne and singing at the top of his lungs. I kinda wanted to give him my life savings
soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
my purse only fit my wallet or the martini shaker. it wasnt even a question of which i was bringing.
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
You have cats and a ten year IUD. Embrace it.
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
Randomize
