so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
Dudeeeee, i ordered strippers for my party.
I ordered a moonbounce.
Fuck, you win.
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
Go christen that room with your naked body.
I just hope the day something happens to me my phone just dies, like literally died and will never turn on ever again. I feel like God owes me that much.
MY INSIDES ARE BASICALLY BEING WRUNG BY A CHAINSAW IM NEVER TAKING PLAN B AGAIN
I woke up to a huge bag of McDonalds breakfast, a cup of coffe and Advil. The note read "yeah its a one night thing, but I felt bad so here you go. Thanks"
He just set a new unobtainable standard in one night stand etiquette.
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
Randomize
