Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
I just dropped a paperclip into my cleavage while talking to the company president... That's an awkward moment.
Did you at least offer to let him get it out??
So I have to send you an email about my weekend, heretofore referred to as The Perfect Weekend. Wherein I have lots of awesome sex with a guy with THE MOST AMAZING BODY.
I look forward to this email. I will respond with, Condoms and Creepers: The Adventures of Online Dating.
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
LIKE ALL I WANT TO CURE MY HANGOVER IS PORKROLL AND LIKE 85% OF THIS COUNTRY DOESN'T KNOW WHAT IT IS
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
Randomize
