what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
Mom just texted me to see if it was you who was streaking at the Mariner game... Did you accept yet another $1 bet?
I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
you didnt realize it, but you puked in the bushes in front of a church and yelled "GOD IS DEAD"
I just found a reminder in my phone to ask you about your sex life in 7 years. So how is that going?
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
I often wonder if we’re introverted extroverts, but I don’t think so. I think we’re just easily tired scumbags
Randomize
