census says that i am hotter than the girl you just left with...sad for you
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
im holly from the hills drunk
A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
reason #326 why I'm still single.... my date just told me there's a little boy ghost that lives in his closet because he likes his music.
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
Randomize
