dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
I just farted. And everybody around me is looking at the fat girl to my left. I win.
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
These people don't understand my stages of drunk
I asked him to make me two boxes of macaroni and cheese. That's like eight servings. How did I think that was an okay amount.
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
don't worry dude i have your phone, text me when youre gonna come get it
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