she said i have a nice penis, i told her only bob saget and god could judge that.
I was too high to figure out which of the three doors would lead me to my classroom, so i sat down in the middle of the hallway and ate a twinkie.
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
I guess I could probably fit that in between deep self reflection and teenage mutant ninja turtles
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
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