this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
Smoked before work and just remembered i left pringles in my desk last time i was high. SCORE
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
I was just doing the math on how much beer we need for the houseboat. in doing so, I came to the conclusion that we need to open a beer distributor business.
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
You tried to pick a fight with a polka band saying that you'd wrap the accordion around their throats
My roommate walked in on my inserting a tampon. Somehow, I don't think this will be improving our relationship.
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
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