is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
i don't know whats more disturbing, that his dog drooled directly into my mouth or that i was too drunk and tired to do anything except let it be there.
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
I wrote "fuck you meg" on my toaster strudel with the icing. I call it "passive aggressive breakfast"
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
I just want to say that I've always loved you and you are my best friend ever
You gave that creepy guy my number, didn't you? You really need to learn how to just say no, not interested.
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