Having a random hookup so left but love u
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
my whole wardrobe smells like substance abuse
The girl who comes up after me always strips to Lana Del Rey. I didn't think working in a strip club could be any more depressing.
I settled on "Merry Christmas! Btw you may have chlamydia". I thought a nice holiday greeting would soften the blow
YAS. BRING CRAB.
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
Randomize
