I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
Just text the random number in my iphone notes that was entered at 1am. Should be interesting.
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
I'm in the kitchen making quiche for my fuck buddy and his wife. I'm probably not the chick to get dating advice from.
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
Randomize
