This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
i spent 15 mins trying to take money out of ATM with my drivers license saying, "what the fuckkkk" everytime it didnt work
Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
in hindsight, the duct tape banana hammock was a bad idea.
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
Apparently while trying to get up from vomiting in the toilet I grabbed the seat cover for leverage and smashed my own head between it and the bowl. I don't remember this.
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
dude where did you go last night?
when the tequila says to run, you start running.
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
Randomize
