It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
These old people don't even realize they're giving me weed money for shoveling snow.
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
He blew a load on his roommates pillow just to piss him off. Why did you introduce me to these people?
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
Fair warning: I will be throwing corn dogs at you every time I see you this week.
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize
