My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
What's the proper amount of time to avoid my 76 year old neighbor that caught me with my pants down, peeing in my driveway at 5am?
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
Okay we're getting vodka and coming
Okay. Joe has my machete attached to his belt
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
so much tequila, so little girl.
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
I woke up with a chicken in my yard
Do you not remember hopping the fence into a chicken coop and screaming "choot em'"like you were on swamp people?
No recollection, can you come help me shut this thing up
Also. Picked being late to work over the maid finding my vibrator. Life choices....
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
Randomize
