I don't know where I am but the food in the fridge is awesome.
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
They only searched every other person. But I sacrificed myself to get our vodka across the border
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
Randomize
