I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
You know my ex in high school who cheated on me and dumped me right before prom? A decade later, I just saw her again...working at an Arby's. it was a good day...
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
Randomize
