im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
Ordered a large pizza and definitely just paid the cab driver in pizza slices. I'm glad there's someone out there that's just as fat at heart as we are.
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome.
so my pro life roomate found a used condom wrapped up in her sheets with your panties. never letting you have sex in her bed again
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
I just plagiarized Dr. Curtis Connor's ideology from Spider-man in an essay on genetically engineered embryos. College: academic integrity at its finest.
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
I currently don't understand fingers.
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
Randomize
