i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
there's a guy on campus handing out business cards. you pay him to see if your girlfriend will cheat. the company name is "tying up loose ends"
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
I think I wrote "thanks for the free alcohol!!!" in their wedding guest book and I'm almost positive I signed my name
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
I'm laying here half naked telling him I'm eating gold fish to change the subject of hookin up cuz I don't wanna put pants on
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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