he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
How I know that I'm single: when I get a save the date for a wedding & I read "& guest" my first thought was does my bottle of Jack Daniels count.
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
Is it weird that I'm smoking a cig on my back patio in a sports bra and underwear?
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