saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
This guy legit just tried to LSAT formal logic his way into my pants. Contrapositives and everything.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
First funeral I've ever been to where the cops had to come.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
He came over to use the microwave, said he needed to heat up some urine.
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
I got a text saying, "It's so great to throw tomatoes at seagulls."
Just described you as looking like "a very cute escapee from an Egyptian insane asylum"
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
I think I may have gotten way too used to using my boobs as an extra hand/pocket...almost stabbed myself in the chin bc I forgot I put my fork there
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