i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
When I woke up I had three missed calls from the name 'dream krystals'.... If I remember correctly she was the lady at the drive thru at Krystals and her name was Dream.. She wanted to come to the strip club with us... Do you remember?
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
Randomize
