We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
Fast is cars. Home is I now. Drunk yoda me is.
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
What! I said that you would fall in love? See I know better. Dark liquor makes me think everything is a dream. I barely remember saying that
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
Randomize
