My boss' voice literally gives me gas
Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
the first call I got in the morning was from visa fraud prevention so yeah it was one of those nights
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
We didn't have a blender for the margaritas, so she tried to use the garbage disposal and wasted half a handle of my grandpa's good tequila.
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
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