So. Did i wake up at 430, try to drive home, stop to throw up at a shell, and try to clean out my car and drop my keys in a full dumpster? Yes.
operation have a gay friend backfired
The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic.
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
Is it just me or did a policeman park your car last night?
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
In the middle of me riding him, he stopped me and said "You're the kind of person who would be restrained for being obnoxiously drunk on an airplane, huh?"
okcupid is pretty much insisting i hook up with this chick who looks like andy milonakis.
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
Yet he continued to eat cereal out of the glove compartment in my car.
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
COCAINE IS GR8
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
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