Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
SEEEEXXX PLEASE
and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
He waited til after we had sex to tell me he had herpes... Ugh I hate being drunk
Shut up. It sucks being the ugly friend, I would know, but someones gotta play the role
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
I gave the guy a $20 tip on a $9 cab ride, he thought I was just bad at math but I was really just incredibly thankful to be alive and home.
I was like "don't worry, I'm a math major and you deserve the shit out of that 222% tip"
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
my liver is dry heaving
So apparently being drunk at work isn't allowed.. who knew?
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
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