You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
Well I'm going to a gay club in my banana suit. You should come. My bro is going as a pirate. I don't know if there's a theme.
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
As a general rule of thumb, I don't call until the claw marks have healed.
I can't believe this. 100 bucks says my Botox lasts longer than their marriage will.
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
I thought if I bought the most expensive pregnancy test I would look like I had my life together
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
Randomize
