Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
YOU WILL DIE AND I WILL CARVE 'I TOLD YOU SO' ON YOUR HEADSTONE
Woke up next to a half eaten Philly Cheesesteak. Honestly probably one of the top 3 things I've ever woken up next to.
I feel like my foot is being amputated. Or maybe it's the vodka. I couldn't tell you.
Welp. It's confirmed. There is literally no lube on this entire island. Fuck me. More accurately, don't fuck me.
I passed out with the lights and tv on woke up at 4am SO confused and covered in goldfish so I ate them and went back to bed.. fuck xanax
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
Randomize
