adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
I got you a "sorry you think I'm pregnant" present
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
Randomize
