Guess who has two thumbs, loves booze, and just dug half a handle of rumb out of a trash can in a freshmen dorm? This classy gentleman. Good day to you sir!
Omg. In the pub, there's a guy shouting at the olympic channel 'yeah! Kill that motherfucker!' we're watching figure skating.
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
Well my door is unlocked for you, I'll be in the bathtub drinking a pre-mixed bottle of margarita until I forget the degree to which my life sucks.
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
I KNEW IT. I HAD A FEELING. THIS IS GODS CURSE. BREAK UP WITH A SEX GOD. GET ONE OF HIS PEASANTS.
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
I've turned into a small time drug dealer, now who's the real MVP.
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
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