At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
Admitting I go to nursing school is my subtle way of saying, yes, I know every muscle in your penis and how to effectively use them.
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
First thought today, I need a ventriloquist dummy that looks like me. This week's project has been determined.
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
hell hath no fury like a questionably-gay best friend scorned
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
You didn't throw up on me, you threw up on yourself and then tried to give me a hug
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
Fuck my life he IS a stripper, Ive been sleeping with a stripper named Phoenix. damnit, I knew the sex was too good
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
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