So drunk its hurt
my grand plan for the evening is to do shots of vodka til i cant anymore
it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
He's against "violent sex" cause apparently my body is "sacred". Like dude I'm about to tell you about blowing your brother just so you'll fuck me like an animal Jesus Christ....
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
Randomize
