Dude, the girl next to me just farted. Worst part, it smells like astroglide
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
He got me an interview at his law firm and his boss asked him what he had to say about me. His response "He dates CRAZY bitches."
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
Randomize
