Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
If he can handle my muffin top then I can handle his front teeth.
the first sign of life we got from you was four hours later. you smiled without opening your eyes when tom whispered in your ear we were getting buffalo wings.
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
Wow. A quad shot of peppermint schnapps. I feel like I just deep throated a candy cane. Best 21st ever.
Y'know, "Class cancelled because Professor is stuck in Mexico," is not something I expected in college. Let alone, "Professor is stuck in Mexico, AGAIN."
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
I'm not breaking up with him because his husky is having puppies.
I'm bonding with your girlfriend. I like her. We're plotting your demise.
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
Randomize