All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
I'm sorry about your car but on a brighter note I did wake up in my dorm. That's something right?
Fuck you.
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
I've created a drink called, "watching the sound of music with grandma." its straight vodka
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
Can one of you do me a favor? Light a match and throw it into my room. Bc I'm certain I would rather be burned to death than live in this hell I call my life
He puked in the voicemail. That's a true friend right there.
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
Randomize
