a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
I just saw the Mona Lisa in the background of a porno. Whole new appreciation for art. fuck you I'm cultured.
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
I just wanna say I did some math and I lasted 1,052,000 more minutes than you at the bar before I got kicked out. That's 729 days. Bitch
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
While I was sneeking out of her apartment, there was a giant cage with a parrot in it. I half expected it to squak "hit and run...hit and run."
I just stood still on a stair at the train station expecting it to go down automatically like an escalator... Today's going to be a good day
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
Randomize
