where are you
in your bedroom
how did you get in
your wife…
WTF
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
Neighbor who got arrested at 3am just said he'd split the $ with me if I testify as the witness in his police brutality trial. He was also holding a baby and a case of beer.
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
I enjoy the company of your penis
Randomize
