shotgunning a bud heavy is like shotgunning a turkey sandwich
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
TSA literally pulled two bottles of whiskey out of my bag. Once he saw the leopard print socks and the mickey mouse tank, he put it back in my bag and said "Have a fun trip, man."
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
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