Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
even my farts smell like vagina
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
I know its hard to believe that I'm already drunk at 12 p.m. but I am, so dont call me asking to go to the gym.
She bit me. She gave me a brief pity cuddle. I gave her an awkward backrub, somehow I thought it would be a good idea to include the vagina in that. It wasn't.
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
premonition: im going to wake up covered in mashed potatoes
90% sure I just sold adderall to my professor
100% proud
Randomize
