Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
definitely just forgot to put car in park in front of a police officer and ran into a bush.
We got really stoned and then we fucked. Then he made me a panini.
Oooh, he sounds pretty classy
Actually, not at all. We were stoned so he made me a peanut butter panini. With a Rollo in the middle of it. And he left the panini press on all night. I could have died.
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
We were high as balls fucking in the back seat when we saw the blue lights. He's like, "I got this" and walked over butt ass naked and goes, "Sorry dude, we're just banging" and the cop apologized for disturbing us and drove off.
This mustache is awesome. I can't pass by a mirror without looking in it and thinking damn, I'd like to give that guy a handy.
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
Literally the fucking master of salvaging the possibility of a blow job whilst also crushing somebody's dreams.
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
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