gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
FYI, if you pee in my bed (or even let R___ and E___ sleep in it), I will fart loudly during your wedding vows. Trust.
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
I probably should have cut it off when he started putting queso on my nipples, but within ten minutes I was a self-serve burrito bar.
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
Definitely just put my car on cruise control so I could stick my head out of the sunroof while driving to taco bell.
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
Let's put a bunch of beers in a backpack and shotgun them in a Red Lobster bathroom
Okay so I've been talking to the mice again and they agree with me that you're a piece of shit.
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
Randomize
