There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
You promised me a handle of vodka if I took home her ugly friend. Thanks to law class I took for the 2nd time I know that's a unilateral contract asshole
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
Your either lost or getting food, if your lost find me a girl on your way back, if your getting food grab me a double cheese
Brown or brunette? Ketchup or mustard?
I love you bro
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
Watching the Walking Dead, snuggled up naked, and drinking a beer. No better way.
If ever there was a tweet to describe your life, it's this.
Left Las Vegas at 2:30 am, woke up at 11 AM at a Barstow gas station with the Valet from Ceaser' palace snoring in the backseat and no memory of how we got there. I felt like Raoul Fucjing Duke right then and there.
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
Definitely went to court without a bra and panties because Mr. LastNight’s dog stole them. I guarantee you I was the only lawyer going commando in court
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize
