It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
Welcome to texting with Mike. You're now leaving the sober section and headed to our insanely high bad decision making portion of mike. Enjoy the trip.
Please stop leaving drunk voicemails with your new black/Irish accent.
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
My liver and I thought we knew what we signed up for. We were wrong.
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
Randomize
