Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
At the hospital, the nurse kept telling me that i either had appendicitis, a tubular pregnancy, or an ovarian cyst. I kept asking if i could just have chlamydia instead...
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
I couldn't help thinking that my sock monkey was judging me
My liver is crying. And I feel like I got fingered by Edward Scissorhands. While he was wearing brass knuckles
I paused the movie when the delivery guys arrived, and while they were assembling the bed, one of the guys pointed to the tv and said "why so serious?" And it made the whole experience happy.
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
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