Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
I want to give you a handjob with my mouth.
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
Also, I found out that my dad has the name of every boy that I've ever dated and their physical description, car type and tag number stored in his computer.
Apparently Angela went missing once and he says he learned were to look first and that it's best to have information on hand.
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
You know we have no secrets, right? I mean, you saw me shitting in a gift bag drunk and naked on Christmas eve.
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
I'm over here trying to figure out how to get shake shack delivered to my bed and Jamie is having a child
no no no no you can't just say your dirtiest secret is "i sat on goldfish by accident once" and just leave i have QUESTIONS
AT LEAST TELL ME IF THE GOLDFISH WAS STILL IN A BOWL??????????????
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