You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
i woke up this morning cuddling with a 3 foot statue of Jesus. heaven here i come
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
Walk of Shame today included voting.
I'm sweating so much right now i look like Whitney Houston
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
Found the puke drawer
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
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