Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
I'm drunk and you're awesome. let's stay this way forever.
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
Dude, she got on top of me, grumbled in a low voice "I'm going to make you remember me", and then farted.
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
I have this terrible fear I might accidentally text a pic of my dick to my grandma
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
The guy behind me is talking about how his life goal is to use his knowledge of mathematics to make the world a better place. My only life goal right now is getting through this lecture without throwing up in my lap.
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
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