Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
Her life has all the ingredients for a how to book: Making Your Life an Epic Fail
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
Yeah, half my ass was burnt and I was missing a shoe. I'm blaming you for the shoe.
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
Welcome to the single world where it seems vibrator batteries are in short supply and making a sandwich while naked at 2am is relatively normal
I slept through 4/20 and my roommates bought an entire ham that's just sitting in the fridge...
Finally hooked up with her. She bought me tacos after because "she can do better in a bed". You're gonna be my best man.
I didn't wake up drunk this year...I must be getting soft
Yeah I guess quad-fisting Miller Lites just isn't as effective as it used to be
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
I blame everything on you. My broken heart, my fucked up liver and my twisted mind.
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
Randomize
