O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
if you find a joe biden blowup doll in the attic, I call dibs
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
You told me I couldn't make out with you until I added you on LinkedIn
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
There's a stripper getting there at 10 though so hopefully I'm out before the stripper gets there. I don't have time to deal with a stripper.
The stall at this bar had mirrors all around. I just looked at myself take a shit from like 3 different angles
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
Randomize
